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Esther's Diary - Week 14I don't want to grow up


How can we be responsible parents, if we feel that we have not grown up quite yet?

Photograph: Bbcsi RŅƒbert Lbszlou

Time does not stop pregnant. Pregnant and inactive and slowly being admitted, but progressing. The sick are slowly getting lost and replaced by the old good engine, energy. The request that I am most concerned with nowadays keeps coming back, letting me rest, sleep, liberate: do I have to grow up now that I have a child? It seems ridiculous, so to speak, to say the least, but when you digest it, you are depressed. So this is "Am I grown up, will I be?" Asking is also a guide to my life, for me childhood, the edge of infantilism, naivety (?) provide a much safer world than adults. I never take life seriously, maybe for a moment, for a moment, but it is not worth it in the long run because it brings disappointment, disillusionment, and loss of rationalism. Everything is clearer from a child's point of view, although we don't see this transient world. In a person's mind, he changes a lot and constantly, physically, hormonally, in character. In the ten weeks since I know I am not alone, there are so many unknown sensations and requests in me that there is no place to write them down. Am I going to be able to raise her? Obviously yes. But how? You need to be a good person, you need to survive in the world, you need to be strong, smart, smart, clear in heart to prosper. How will I be supported when I run to my parents many times? How am I going to be an adult when I have been opposed to being an adult all the time ?! This kid is twisting the noodle. Am I going to become someone who doesn't want to be? Should I set boundaries for him when I hate them myself? Slowly I'll get the answer to every request. I believe that childhood can be as much of an activity as it is in the midst of my life and happiness, and I only set boundaries for it in our everyday life, as well as to be free and dare. When things like this were going on inside, my former classmate (one of the foundations of our amateur body) just called out to be able to recreate for a little, amateur birth in MOM Munch. Of course, yes, what better remedy? To live in front of people, to play, to not be myself, to jump back into my old life, to close the first, trimester alien, bleak world. I need it now!
Combined test. So call the exam that was due to me this week. 12-14. weekly, with a combination of ultrasound (this was once in the past) and a blood test. Ultrasound is used to determine the exact height of pregnancy based on height, then to measure the lumbar spine and examine the presence of the nasal bone. There are two tests in the integrated test, the first in the first trimester (first trimester of pregnancy), the second in the second trimester, 15 to 18 weeks old, and two in the test. They say the combined test is 85 percent accurate and the integrated test is 94 percent accurate. It's also one thing that everyone says something, who does it, who does it with the risk of down-filtering, the public selects the latter. I asked my ultrasound doctor in my early mischief and, confirming my age (29), he chose to have the combined test before.
A lot of decisions right now, even though it's just a little peach seed for this kid! No transition, we're all over Giza. I can't fool you, but sometimes I have to do it as if I was growing up.